Vision Work
Overview
What is it? Vision Work is guided, reflective imagining about what life you long for at some point in the future, in particular, what do you want your family life to be like?
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How does it work? You can do vision work with me either as one family or as a small group. The one family option is more successful if all parents can participate. Small groups can be initiated either by clients, for example 3-4 families who are friends and want to support each other. We meet 4 times for an hour via Zoom and you will complete reflection exercises between meetings.
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Let's call your current family situation "The Island of Now" and the situation you want to be in when your children are adults "The Island of Then". We will work together to clarify both islands and to outline the process needed to travel from Now to the Then. We will imagine the islands you may visit during the journey and what you need to complete the journey.
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Why is this work important to do? If you plan on your children living with you for the rest of your lives with you caring for them as you do now, then this work is not for you. If you plan on kicking them out the door when they become legal adults and you never want to see them again, then this work is not for you. If you hope to have an emotionally-close relationship with your independent, successful adult children, then this is the beginning of the work you need to do.
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If we parent without thinking about what we want the future to be, then we usually end up with the same relationship with our children that we have with our own parents. That's because we behave with patterns we inherited from our parents, unless we intentionally choose our parenting approach. Creating a vision for our future gives us a beacon to guide our choices.
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What do you want to do next?
Vision Work in Detail
What is your vision for your best life? Can you imagine what tomorrow would be like if it were the perfect day with your family? Can you imagine your family’s perfect day ten years from now? Twenty years from now?
Without a vision it is difficult to know where to put our energy and where to focus. Without a vision to guide us, our movements become dictated solely by our current circumstances. We react automatically rather than respond thoughtfully.
Let’s work together to clarify your vision, turning those vague longings into a crisp, technicolor movie. Let’s get in touch with your definitions of successful parenting, of your best life, of relationships that nourish you.
When we work together, your vision is yours. In our judgment-free, brave space, my responsibility will be to hold the space and help you explore through asking gentle questions. You will have the freedom and the opportunity of nurturing your vision into clarity. I have no expectations of your vision, its form, or its expression. I simply want to support you in finding your unique vision.
Vision work requires going in – into our hearts, into our hidden spaces, into our past, into our deepest self-images. I will be your companion as you journey inward, lending you courage, strength, compassion, humor, and whatever else you need. You can share mine until yours grows strong enough to support you. We will take the journey into your vision at your pace; whatever pace feels safe enough for you.
Vision work also requires developing awareness of our beliefs – Who do we believe that we are? Who told us that we are that? What truths are held within that belief? What non-truths are held? Together we will identify the beliefs that guide you, so that you can decide to keep them, alter them, or let go of them. You can decide what beliefs you want to embrace and together we can plant them and water them so they grow strong.
Once you have it, you can begin living into your vision. Guided by your vision, you can set up rhythms, rituals, and routines that provide a pathway. Guided by your vision and its values, you can construct supportive expectations and boundaries. With these, you can relax into the full presence of each moment, trusting that as the moments pass,
you are living into your vision.